Tag: disability

I can’t get no sleep

It’s almost 2AM and, like the Faithless song says, I can’t get no sleep. It has nothing to do with insomnia in my case though, but has just about everything to do with an achy back and neck that has been bothering for most of the day.

It’s not all bad though. At least the headache that came along with it on and off since I woke up seems to have gone away and I’ve been able to sort out a couple of blog posts and edit a video before I crawled into bed. I know, I know, being on the laptop writing this is hardly going to help matters, but it’s helping me feel less frustrated about the fact I can’t seem to nod off.

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Our current kettle

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We recently had to get a now kettle after our last one stopped working.

I like the way that this one looks but everything else about it is taking quite a bit of getting used to.

I fill it up using a jug because of where the handle is positioned and it’s quite a bit heavier than the old one too.

Having conversations as a wheelchair user

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Me in my wheelchair

As a wheelchair user I sometimes find having conversations in public.  Not because I can’t speak or am very shy, but because it’s hard to hear.

Being in a wheelchair means that you’re lower down than everyone else. I’m only four ft 10in but I don’t find this quite so hard when I’m on my walking frame but I still sometimes struggle.

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Rediscovering my motivation

It feels like things are changing here in NicLand, and that is most definitely a good thing.

It’s now been three years since I finished my multimedia journalism degree and a lot has happened to me since then. When I graduated I felt mentally and physically stronger than I had ever done. I could walk further and do more for myself than I had been able to in the past, and my anxiety and low moods weren’t impacting on me anywhere near as much as they had done when I was studying for my A-levels and in my first year at uni. Yes, I was scared about what the future might hold, but more than anything, I was excited.

Fast forward two years and the story became very different. Even though I’d done work experience, an internship and a bit of freelance work, I still hadn’t found a fulltime job. I wasn’t getting out much during the week because everyone around me had jobs, and that meant that I spent a lot of time alone with my thoughts. I spent far more time focusing on my worries, my anxieties and everything and my OCD-like thoughts about germs. I started showering up to three times a day and changing my clothes, worrying that they would have germs on them that would infect the house. I spent a lot of time crying and not a lot of time sleeping. To put it bluntly, I was a mess.

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