Autumn Blues

I know, I know; blue isn’t a colour traditionally associated with Autumn. I know that for most people it’s all about orange, red and brown crunchy leaves, fully PJs and adding pumpkin spice to absolutely everything, but not to me.

I dislike Autumn and I absolutely hate winter. I dread this time of year in pretty much the same way that I dread dentist appointments. I fret about it for weeks in advance, and always go into it expecting the worst. Unlike most of my trips to the dentist though, Autumn/Winter aren’t over in five minutes.

Thanks to my cerebral palsy, this time of year sucks. My aches and pains increase 10-fold (sometimes literally), my poor circulation makes my feet so cold they hurt, and it gets harder and harder for me to leave the house on my own thanks to the slippery fallen leaves/wind/ice/snow that a lot of the people I know IRL seem to love so much.

I’m always the coldest person in a room, which isn’t helped by having to use my wheelchair more and more. Believe me, you get colder than you might think when you’re just sitting there being whipped by the falling leaves/wind/ice/snow that everyone else seems to love so much.

I’m already starting to feel it and the fn’s only just begun for this year, and I’m already not sure I have the mental and physical energy to deal with it.

I wish I could join in with the excitement, but I can’t.


Motivation nose-dive

I feel a bit guilty because today’s blog post isn’t really disability-related. I guess it’s going to be one of those general life update-y thingys where I end up telling you all what’s going on in Nicland and probably asking for advice.

These last couple of months have been mega busy, and busy is great. I’m the kind of person who measures whether I’ve had a good or bad day by just how much or how little I’m managed to get done. Not to blow my own trumpet, but I think I’m generally quite good at keeping myself motivated because of this.

I mean, believe it or not, I’ve been writing this blog on a pretty regular basis for about 2 and a half years now, and I realised a few weeks ago that I’ve also been regularly uploading YouTube videos for a year too. Throw in the fact that I’m currently taking part in National Novel Writing Month and aiming to write 50,000 words of a novel in the thirty days of November, I should be so happy I have so many things to be getting on with that I should be bouncing.

Yet, I’m not.

These past few days I’ve wanted to stay snuggled up in the warmth of my bed, binge-watching Netflix until I lose all track of time. I don’t feel like I’ve been posting on here and I feel bad about that. Sometimes I really can’t stand the thought of sitting at my desk to work.

Sometimes I work in bed instead, but it’s not a habit I really want to get into.

I think some of it may be down to the changing seasons. It’s getting darker earlier and cold and my pajamas as some of the warmest clothes I own, The fact that the summer weather is giving strong winds, and the snow and ice we’ll probably be be getting soon, is making it harder to go out isn’t helping either.

I’ve barely started my Christmas shopping and i usually like to have it all done by the December rush.

Do you struggle to stay motivated during this time of the year? What do you do?

Oh, snow!

Every winter, I dread the arrival of the stuff they call snow. Some years we don’t get any and sometimes we do.

I find it really hard to walk around outside when it hits. During these times I often don’t leave the house without someone with me for the fear that I will fall or get myself stuck somewhere.When I do go out, I take someone with me, and I use my wheelchair instead of my walking frame.

Earlier I noticed that things suddenly got very dark outside. At first I think it was raining really hard and then I noticed there was white stuff falling from the sky. At first I thought that it might have been hailstones because they were drumming quite hard against the window, it still might have been to start with, I’m not too sure. I wandered over to the window to take a look and noticed that the stuff falling from the sky seemed to look softer than before. I stood watching it come down for a few moments and the roofs of nearby houses started to get dusted in a fine white powder, as did the road and pavement.

It was snow.

Then, as quickly as it started, it stopped again. I think It’s all gone from the pavement and the road now, but there’s still a little bit on the houses.

I’m hoping that that will be the end of our snow for this year, but I wouldn’t be at all surprised if we got some more.

Getting cold feet

My Microwavable socks
My Microwavable socks

Over the past few days I rally have been getting the feeling that winter isn’t too far away again.

No, not because the trees are losing their leaves or because the days are getting shorter, but because it’s getting to the time of year where I start wearing multiple pairs of socks.

I don’t think I’ve ever met another person who owns quite as many pairs as I do. I have enough to fill an entire drawer so that it can barely close without giving it a huge shove, and then I fill a separate overnight bag too. Even when I wear tights, a put a pair on over my feet.

Because of the way my feet drag on the floor when I walk, I put holes in the toes very quickly. I never throw any odd ones away because I go through them so quickly. Some days, it can take ages to find  a matching pair if I’m head out to an appointment or something like that.

I got the pair of microwavable ones that Rob got me out of the wardrobe the other day in preparation, and it won’t be long before they get used again. I can’t walk in them but I can sit in them while I read books and type all my job applications. My gloves have made a reappearance in my coat pocket too, and I don’t think it will be much longer before I don my hat and scarf too.

What do you do to keep warm when the weather turns cold?