I made a new video about things that I’m scared/nervous about doing because of my disability, cerebral palsy.
I hope you all understand what I was trying to say with this video. If you like this one, then why not go check out my YouTube channel?
In case you can’t tell by the title of this post I have a very love/hate relationship with London.
I think I went for the first time about three years ago, and before that I’d tried to avoid it because the thought of being a physically disabled, not-very-fast-moving girl in such a big and busy city scared me. Oh, and the fact I have no sense of direction didn’t make me feel any better.
Fast forward three years, and I’ve just got back from my third visit there with my family. The thought of being a a physically disabled, not-very-fast-moving girl in such a big and busy city still scares me. I’ve only ever taken my wheelchair and not even tried to take my walking frame yet, but I know that if I ever decide that I want to brave it alone then I’ll have to because I can’t push myself in my self-propelling wheelchair very well.
Doing London in my wheelchair isn’t pleasant; not for me anyway. When I’m sat in it I tend to come up to people’s waists, and when all you can see around you at busy times is bodies everywhere that are far taller than you it can feel quite claustrophobic and makes me very nervous.
However, because I only ever go to London for holidays, I think about all the fun things that I do in London and all the places that I like to go when I’m there like Southbank and Soho and I think ‘yes I like it here’. Until, that is, I either have to find my way back to where I’m staying or to the next place I need to go and the cycle starts again.
I don’t know if I’ll ever have the guts to do London alone, but I do know that I don’t feel ready just yet, and I think that’s okay for now.