Life feels a little better when…

  • My cat is on my bed or my lap
  • My dog asks for a cuddle (it depends what mood she’s in.)
  • I have a cup of tea in my hand
  • I actually make the effort to put on make up
  • My boyfriend stays over
  • I’m in the middle of a really good book
  • I finally get the last answer on a crossword
  • I know there’s chocolate in the house
  • I have a warm wheatbag on my back

What are the little things that make you feel better on a bad day?

My main pain issues January 2017

As you probably know by now, my cerebral palsy means that there is not a day in my life that is totally pain free. I don’t mind this. Most of the time it’s a constant level that is my ‘normal.’ When my pain is at this level, I find it manageable and it doesn’t stop me doing anything. It’s kind of like having the radio on in the background at the office. You know it’s there, but you kind of zone in and out depending how focused you are on your work.

The problem is that when a pain starts to bother me more than I would like, the things I do to combat it and make it manageable can sometimes cause other recurring aches and pains to spring up or intensify. Imagine you’re playing a game of Whack-a-Mole, only the moles are various pain issues and the machine itself is your body.

I’m kind of caught in one of these situations at the moment. The top of my back has been hurting again, so I’ve been laying on my front with a hot wheat bag on my back to stretch it out. It really helps, which is all well and good, but because it really helps I’ve been doing it a lot. This might sound like a good thing, and I suppose in a way it is. except that I’ve done in so much that I’ve over-stretched some of the muscles in my chest – again.

So now I have an aching back and an aching chest. Laying on my front  helps the back pain still, but aggravates the sore chest muscles – as does wearing a bra, but that’s a whole other thing.

I fall into this trap quite a lot. I think I’ve posted about it before even. The problem is that I have no idea how to get out of it now that I’m in it, or how to stop myself getting stuck in it. Do you know what I mean?

The challenge has been set

Well guys, there’s no denying that my updates on this blog have been very sporadic over the last two years or so. I met up with some friends last night. and we got chatting about the stuff I get up to online, when one friend, let’s call her L (hi if you’re reading this, by the way), commented on when I have and hadn’t been posting. Basically the whole conversation ended with me saying that I really do need to update more, and that I would do it every day for a week in an effort to kick-start my plan.

So, here we have it. I’m going to post every day on this blog for the next seven days, but not everything will be cerebral palsy-related. Some of you might think this is a great idea and some of you might get sick of me popping up in your various social media feeds, but I’m going to do it. You have been warned.

I have an acupuncture appointment later this week that I’ll be able to update you on, and at least one video that I need to get edited and put onto YouTube that I can share here too. If there’s anything you’d like me to write about then let me know.

See you tomorrow,

Nic x

 

 

Trying not to think too big

Hello everyone and happy New Year. I hope your 2017 has got off to a great start and continues to be good to you.

Even though it has been fun, I am quite glad that all of the festivities are over. Christmas was busy, New Year was busy. My birthday was busy. Life has been busy. But now things can finally get back to normal, which all sounds great, except that I don’t really know what my normal was/is in the first place.

This time of year is hard for me. Everywhere I turn there are people talking about all the great things that they’ve achieved in year gone by, and what they’re hoping to achieve in the one ahead, and how they’re going to get there, and that’s great. Go all of you. I wish you luck.

Yet, it’s impossible to deny that my life has stalled since I graduated university back in 2012. The career I wanted, and still want to have, hasn’t taken off in the way that I would’ve liked which has lead to me still living at home, and that is not where I thought I’d be by the time I turned 26. I have yet to actually manage to get any of my writing published. I do feel like I’m making progress in all of these things though so that’s something. However, this year I have decided that I am not going to set myself any big goals because all that has done in the past is make me miserable and stressed. This year I want to be all about smaller goals, like, maybe not getting my novel draft to an agent, but to get a couple of short stories or poems to a point where I think they might be good enough to send off to competitions. I want to be able to writer shorter to-do lists, rather than making them overly long on purpose because I have a tendency to feel worthless if I’m not being productive enough.

Although last year was a pretty good one for me, it was a bad one for my mental health. I had a couple of massive slumps, and am currently still in one of I’m honest about it. I’m back in CBT therapy and that’s okay.  2017 may not be the year that my career takes off, writing or otherwise, but I would like it to be the year I start to stop thinking so big, and start to allow myself to feel better.

I hope you have a good one,

Nic xx

 

 

 

 

 

November was indeed crazy!

Hey, remember how I wrote that blog post before November even started saying that it was going to be a crazy month, what with NaNoWriMo going and all my appointments and stuff? Well it turned out to be an even crazier month than I thought, what with NaNoWriMo going on, all my appointments, going to see one of my favouriate authors doing a talk, and my family re-homing a dog from some of our friends who couldn’t give her as much attention as they would have liked any more. Yup, you read that right Little Miss Turns-Into-A-Ball-of-Anxiety-Everytime-a-Dog-Even-Looks-At-Her now shares a home with a dog. And I love her. Well, I never.

Let’s start at the beginning, shall we? My first day of NaNo was awful, and it didn’t get any better. It took me about two days to get what I affectionately call ‘NaNo Neck’ this year. That is what I call it when my neck, back and shoulders all hate me for pending too much time hunched over my laptop, which happens every year sooner or later. My plot was virtually non-exsistant (and still is.) I had several days where I didn’t write anything, but I dragged myself over the finish line with a few hours to spare. Here’s a YouTube video I made about the whole thing, if you’re interested.

 

Needless to say the month was a tough one in terms of my cerebral palsy, what with all the extra pain and the cold (omg the cold) but I did have my botox and they’ve ordered me some new boots to go with my calipers, which I needed as my old ones were getting holes in. Oh, and everything went fine at the dentist, which is always nice. Apparently I don’t have to go for another nine months now instead of six months. Yippee!

So, let’s talk about the dog now. She’s a six year-old shi tuz called Tallulah and at first I was really, really nervous about getting her. I’ve never had a dog before, and don’t know a lot about them, and the ones that I have been around have generally been bouncy or yappy or too playful for me to handle, and then of course there is my whole ‘cats are clean dogs are dirty’ thing that my brain thinks for some reason.

There were a few teething problems so I kept things quiet about her online until we had them a bit more under control in case it turned out that we weren’t the right family for her and she wasn’t the right dog for us. Anyway, things have settled and we’re keeping her, although things still aren’t easy because the poor little thing is undergoing a phantom pregnancy (she’d just had her last season a month of two before we got her) and the poor thing is very sad and confused about why she doesn’t have puppies yet.

So, that was the hectic month that was Novemeber. Hopefully I’ll be back a little more regularly now. How are you guys?

November is getting crazy!

Yes, I am we’re still only in October (just) but November is already shaping up to be a pretty mental month here in Nicland.

I already have three appointments scheduled, two are CP-related and one isn’t.

I’ll be heading to the dentist for my regular check-up, which should hopefully only be one session, as well as going to the orthotics department to get news shoes fitted for my calipers, and having another round of Botox in my legs to help relax the muscles.

But that’s not all that I have going on.

November is also National Novel Writing Month, a project that challenges people all around the world to write 50,000 words in 30 days. That might not sound like a lot of work to some of you, but when you’re trying to balance that with everything else going on it your life, time can pass by without you even noticing.

If you want to know more about  how I get on, I’ll (hopefully) be doing weekly videos on my YouTube channel again. Either way, it will be nice to get some more positive content going up on this blog in the next few weeks.

Let the fun begin!

A Raven’s Touch by Linda Bloodworth Cover Re-Reveal

So, some of you may remember me telling you that my blogging friend and fellow writer Linda Bloodworth had self-published her novel A Raven’s Touch at (I think) the end of last year, but Linda will correct me if I’m wrong. I’ve followed Linda’s writing journey since I started by own blog three years ago, and so, of course, when the book came out I couldn’t wait to read it. (if you’re interested, you can find my review here).

Linda recently had a new cover created for the book, and originally asked me if I wanted to help with the cover re-reveal, but, TLDR, life got in the way. However, because I loved the book so much I still want to share the new cover with you, along with some info on the book and the author herself in the hope that you’ll enjoy it as much as I did.

Without further adieu feast your eyes on the newly updated cover for A Raven’s Touch.

A Raven's Touch by Linda Bloodworth

The cover was created by Amanda Walker. Feel free to ask her questions about her pre-made covers. Linda says she is fantastic to work with, honest, and super friendly. She also offers PA services, so do check her out.

BLURB:
Bullied through high school, seventeen-year-old Justice St. Michaels is grateful for the help of her best friend Moira O’Fhey. Together they’re just managing to scrape through the nightmare they call high school. Between Justice’s bizarre body changes and being involved in explosive school fights, things are going from bad to worse. Darien Raventhorn arrives on the scene only to add fuel to an already burning question—has Justice been living a lie her whole life? Thrust into an unwanted revenge mission Justice must avenge a family death, embrace her birthright, and slay a demon before all Hell breaks loose.

BIO:
Linda Bloodworth loves chips, like really, ketchup to be exact. Ketchup chips are only found in Canada. Lucky for Linda she lives in Toronto with her husband and three fur babies. In between writing, debating for hours about the Oxford comma, and the misunderstood semi colon, Linda enjoys camping and getting away from the city on day trips.

Here’s the only picture that Linda will allow:
linda-hair

How do I get my hands on this book!?
Right here >>> https://books.pronoun.com/a-ravens-touch/

I’m so proud of Linda for getting her book out there into the world, and I’m super excited that she’s started working on the sequel!